For you to learn how to think the way you want, first, you need to identify your type of thinking.
Types of Thinking
Using the ABC Cognitive Behavioural Model, there are two distinct types of thinking involving the following:
A – Activating Events (Situation, Circumstance, Triggers, Relationships, and Social Environment)
B – Beliefs and Thoughts
C - Consequences – pleasant or unpleasant feeling / sensation in the body (emotions) - Cognition, Physical reactions , Actions and Inaction
1. A-C Thinking – This is where you believe what is being (things that exist) or what is doing (other people) make you feel and behave in the way that you do.
This thinking pattern makes you feel helpless with substantial limitations. It is a belief that events and others around you control you, and they have to change before you can. Also, you have no control over you.
The belief that external circumstances cause how you feel and act can keep you in a vicious cycle with no rest. This is because things will ‘always’ be happening around you, and this can lead to #stress, #anxiety, or #depression.
2. B-C Thinking – This eliminates the feeling of helplessness associated with the ‘A-C’ Thinking because you understand that YOU determine your feelings and actions, rather than anything external. You realise that the meaning you give to what is being and what is doing, your interpretation of the event, which include your assumptions, opinions, and core beliefs, determine your feelings in creating your reality.
The B-C thinking can make you feel limitless, liberated, and empowered, knowing that you are in control. Yes, you will still have some automatic thoughts (Positive or Negative). However, you remain in control and know you have the power to keep, amend, or reframe from unhelpful #ACTs Anxiety Creating Thoughts.
Think Mind Emotional Nurturing _ How to Think.
The Self-Coaching Model: Your thought creates your feeling and action. Taking psychological responsibility and adopting the new belief that while most things might be outside your control, your thoughts, feelings, and actions are within your control.
Thinking about Thinking: Spot and start changing your unhelpful beliefs about what you are thinking. Whether you are making it mean something about yourself, others, or the world; dropping it all and #BeingCurious is a helpful start.
Think on Purpose: Learn to and match your thought with your feelings, and control your actions using your brain (#Neuroplasticity) in creating feelings of confidence.
You can achieve all this, but first, you want to learn to balance your being and doing.
Neenan, M. and Palmer, S. (2012) Cognitive Behavioural Coaching in Practice: An Evidence Based Approach London: Routledge